My New Mama!

Today is so perfectly awesome! I'm so thankful for everything He's been giving to me. It feels like time flies so fast. On the past two weeks, I was very busy studying so hard for my college exams. Studying in the very early morning was my routines. I just had no enough time if I didn't do that. You might not able to feel how tiring it was, but I feel so content afterwards that I can pass it pretty well.

Well, why did I say today is an awesome day? Hehehe I'm honestly speechless, but I need to write this kind of perfect feeling. Pardon my bad diction then! My man's mom just bought me a pair of beautiful shoes. She intends to give me that shoes so that I can wear it when I have to teach at a school.

This morning, when I had my own show in my radio station, she called and asked me about the size of my shoes. I was surprised that she told me she wanted to buy me a pair of shoes. You know, I am easily touched by such a simple thing! I almost cried, but I didn't think it's appropriate to cry at that time. Hehe. Then I texted my man directly, telling him about that. He just laughed happily. I actually felt a bit uncomfortable with what my man's mom wanted to do, but I had no power to stop what she would do of course :p hahaha

This afternoon I was at my office accomplishing some work. I had a call again and it was from my man's mom again, telling me she had been in front of my office bringing the shoes she just bought. She gave it to me and got home with my man's dad. After being home, she texted me asking how was the shoes? Did they fit me or not? Was I happy or not? Hmm... if only I could tell her how happy I was be by the text I sent accordingly. I just could tell her that I love the shoes so much & thanked her. She also gave me some advice that I have to be punctual in accomplishing my study & I must have a good time management skill! I was very happy knowing she loves and cares about me that much! I just love her a lot!

I compare the shoes as a present for myself for studying so hard lately. This is unbelievable how my man's mom could know what I need, really need. Not what I want. She has helped me to scrimp and save my money for other needs.

Oh my, from the very first time I met her, she had impressed me by the way she treated me! She loves me as if I am her own daughter. As the time goes by, I know so much better that she has been loving, knowing, understanding, and caring about me even more than my own parents. I'm obviously so lucky!

All right, I want to do my best for her. At least I will let her know that I'm so serious about my study as much as her concern about my study as well. I'm happy to have a new mama like her. I love her so much!

Selamat Hari Guru, Pacarku :')

Tanggal 25 November kemaren adalah peringatan hari guru. Dulu sih gak gitu ngaruh ya, paling cuma inget sama guru-guru spesial semasa saya sekolah. Cuman sekarang, berhubung pacar sendiri sudah berprofesi sebagai guru, jadi ada yang beda gitu. Lebih greng! (eh?)

Saya sangat suka berdiskusi & bercerita sama pacar. Kadang dia denger cerita saya tentang kuliah, kerja & kadang kita diskusi tentang berbagai hal yang ingin saya tau. Kalo pas giliran dia yang cerita, dia lebih suka cerita tentang kerjaan dibanding kuliah. Secara skripsinya masih magrok dan saya suka naek pitam kalo keinget itu. Mendidih dan meledak-ledak ujung-ujungnya. Hehehehe. Jadi wajar kalo dia lebih milih main aman dengan cerita tentang kerjaan.

Gak jarang pacar ngeluh soal kerjaannya. Tapi bukan karena dia capek ato kebanyakan kerjaan, atao bahkan soal gaji. Justru tentang mental para guru di sekolahnya yang seringkali gak manusiawi dan gak punya empati. Sebenernya, tanpa pacar bercerita panjang lebar, saya sudah bisa menilai dan menyimpulkan. Jadi pacar saya itu gak gampang. Saya pun mungkin gak bakal kuat.

Setau saya, jadi guru itu enak. Berangkat pagi jam 7 dan pulang paling pol jam 2. Setelah itu, pekerjaan-pekerjaan administratif lain bisa diselesaikan di rumah dengan santai. Tapi pacar saya kok ngoyo banget ya. Emang sih, pacar saya bukan PNS, tapi cuma guru honorer dengan gaji yang luar biasa minim. Wajar ya kalo gak bisa sesantai guru-guru yang udah PNS, tapi kok kerjaan yang dikasih menurut saya gak manusiawi.

Beberapa minggu yang lalu saya sempat marah-marah karena pacar hampir setiap hari pulang dari sekolah sehabis isya. Saya curiga dia cuma nongkrong sama temen-temen sesama honorer, maen PS, ketawa-ketiwi sambil ngerokok, pokoknya buang-buang waktu semata. Ternyata memang dia kerja. Mulai dari ngurusin ekskul dan lomba-lomba, kerjaan-kerjaan administratif, sampe latihan band buat lomba.

Hmmpphh.. Beberapa kali saya dengan hati-hati nanya ke pacar apa gak ada niatan buat keluar. Atas pertimbangan kuliah yang harus segera diselesaikan, saya rasa pacar lebih baik berhenti ngajar dulu dan fokus nyelesein skripsi. Tapi dia selalu menolak dan meyakinkan kalo skripsi akan selesai tepat waktu. Dia selalu bilang kalo diantara sekian banyak alasan buat keluar dari sekolahnya, ada satu alasan yang bikin dia pengen tetap bertahan; murid-muridnya. Ya, dia sayang sama murid-muridnya, yang biasa dia sebut sahabat-sahabatnya. Saya hampir nangis dengernya. Mungkin saya tidak akan pernah tau seperti apa rasanya, dan mungkin saya akan menganggap alasan pacar saya itu klise. Tapi saya tau dia gak bohong dan dia serius.

Dalam hati saya sangat senang dengan pilihan pacar saya. Bukan harta, bukan jabatan, bukan nama, tapi soal hati dan ketenangan yang dia dapet gak akan pernah tergantikan. Guru seharusnya seperti ini. Saya tau, pacar saya bukan guru yang sempurna, tapi saya juga tau kalo dia layak disebut sebagai pahlawan tanpa tanda jasa. Saya sangat mencintainya.

A Supporter in Vain

It's irritating to say that I feel so frustrated today. I don't like this; arriving home with a lot of tears rolling down on my cheeks. The word that exactly represents my feeling right now is: PATHETIC! Well, I must explode what I feel NOW!

Ever since 2010, life felt more colorful because I found the one that was always there to support me and to be supported by me all at once. Yea, he's my current man. He listened to every good suggestion I gave and he even changed some his bad habits. Of course, I was very happy for every great change. But, as the time goes by, he was accepted as a teacher in a very well-known elementary school in town. I was so proud for sure! And I thought that he really deserved that. Yet,, he turned to be a super busy boy.

To be honest, I feel that time flies so fast. Now, he's already on the 9th semester. You know, an undergraduate student should accomplish his/her study in four years. But what happen with my man? Too bad to say that I DON"T KNOW!!!!

As my concern so far, I've been supporting him wholeheartedly. It sometimes ended up in a fight though. He always says that he has loads of work to do at school. Okay, I admit that, but I think this is only a matter of longing. As long as he's willing, I believe that it can be accomplished so soon. Oh yea, and it's also a matter of life priority that depends only on himself. I don't wanna blame him, really. But, this one gets me into a bad feeling when everyone around me asks about my man's study. I feel so in vain, I feel I'm failed. Unfortunately, I can't also find how to support him appropriately, without getting him angry, without hurting his heart, without making him feel he's forced.

Well, I don't know the answer, but I don't wanna surrender! All I know is just, I have to pray to God, asking for his help. Yea, let's see what will happen!